Friday, July 27, 2007

How Can Any Girl Like Tarzan These Days?

I saw Tarzan the cartoon on Disney channel a couple of nights ago. Well, if I were a kid, I would think that Tarzan and Jane will live happily ever after and Jane could find no better match than the heroic macho beefcake Tarzan. But now that I am way past the days of immaturity and have started making sense in everything I see, I thought that the whole Tarzan-Jane thingy is nonsensical.

I mean, can you see that Tarzan:
1) is uneducated therefore he cannot live elsewhere other than his jungle
2) will never become rich in his entire life even if he makes it into the city. Unless he is willing work for the circus and runs his show free from any blood-sucking agents.
3) lives with a bunch of flea-infested apes family
4) eats fruits ONLY with no variety of preparation.
5) became the chief of the apes, which means he has the heavy responsibility of taking care of his tribe

Imagine how would Jane feel in a few years time when all the heat of romance dies. No woman can live in this condition for long! Especially sophisticated girls like Jane. No shopping. No movies. No gourmet food. Cant go back to civilisation to visit your family and friends. No soap to bathe. Bathe in river water. Subject yourself to threats of other venomous or carnivorous animals. No modern medication. To travel you have to either walk, swing from tree to tree, or hitch a ride from the elephants. Absolutely no form of entertainment. Not to mention your living environment- when its hot and humid you dont have a fan or air-cond to cool yourself, when it rains outside, you only have the trees as shelter....The list can go on and on and on and on and.......

But the worst of all these is... She has to become the Tuanku Permaisuri of the Government of Apes. What a title.


Tantor said...

You are right about the Disney Tarzan. But as Burroughs wrote it originally....Tarzan was a British Lord with a landed estate in England..Google the Greystoke Castle. And in Africa they built a massive country estate and tarzan accumulated a fortune in his adventures in the wilds of Africa. He taught himself to rerad before he met Jane and went on to speak over two dozn languages and traveled all over the world with jane often at her side.
I like the original book Tarzan better myself.
Ken Webber, Denver, CO

John said...

lol you sound jaded more than mature

Iv said...

hah this was pretty funny even if it was a post in 2007.

i can imagine before tarzan met jane, he probably had erm... things going on with other female apes... ugh...